You Kissed Me Once

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unidentifiable-on-a-stickcopyright-Ken Bonham

You kissed me once, while seated on a bench in Central Park, our gloved hands held steaming cups of coffee. My booted foot toed a long dead seed pod, and its remnants scattered on the sidewalk.

Our silence spoke of the depth of our love. How it had settled into the corners of our hearts made dusty by time and the broken shards left by other lovers.

I took a sip of steaming coffee, then kissed your mouth. We smiled at each other, as I drank in the beauty of your face.

You whispered, ‘thank you’, and I blushed in my reply.

 Genre: Romance/101 Words

It’s been so long since I’ve participated in Friday Fictioneers, but this photo spoke to me. Please give me constructive criticism. I assure you I’m tough, and I can take it.

Thanks Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for hosting this exercise in discipline. It is a joy to work with you and have you comment on my work.

Readers please check out the other stories found on Rochelle’s page. Thanks for stopping by.

32 thoughts on “You Kissed Me Once”

  4. Wow! This is what I call “Classic Renee!” A picture of something that was so gross and disgusting and here you put out a beautiful story. Sweet as usual! Thanks, Renee, for making me believe in the good things of life.

    Reply

    • Thank you my friend. The photo was kind of gross, but it did remind me of fall. Love stories are my specialty and I’m so glad that this little story fell out of my head. Thanks for reading it.

      Love, Renee

      Reply

  6. Dear Renee,

    It’s so good to see you back where you belong. 😉

    Such a romantic and tender story. I liked the juxtaposition of sipping coffee and drinking in his beautiful face. I could see this scene in a Hallmark Channel movie. That is a compliment. Those chick flicks are my guilty pleasure.

    shalom,

    Rochelle

    Reply

    • Dear Rochelle,

      I know it’s been awhile since I’ve written a story. I’m so glad I found some inspiration in the photo prompt. And I adore the fact that you love sappy romances as much me. Love, be it good or bad does make the world go ’round.

      Love, Renee

      Reply

  7. Dear Renee,

    Welcome Back!

    I missed you. I hope you are on your way to being knitted up in fine fashion.

    I loved your story. It’s sweet rhythm and the way it speaks to the yearning for love in all of us hooked me from the beginning and held me until the end.

    I don’t think you need the first comma, nor the one in the second sentence of your third paragraph. They hinder the flow (in my mind)

    So glad you are back.

    Aloha,

    Doug

    Reply

    • Dear Doug,

      I’m so happy to be back. Thanks so much for your suggestions, I’ll be sure to make the necessary edits. I tend to get a little happy with my comma placement.

      I’m knitting well and I know that this second surgery is going to be the one that heals me. I need to get back out in the world soon to find some inspiration so that I can continue writing.

      Thank you for the warm welcome back. You’re too kind.

      Love, Renee

      Reply

  15. I like the symbolism and connection that you put between individual phrases. The worn out seedpod parallels the dusty corners of the heart. Drinking in the beauty of a face after taking a sip of coffee. Profoundly hopeful!

    Reply

  16. I really didn’t notice those parallels until you pointed them out. I’m so glad you did! It is a very hopeful story, and one I hope comes true for us all.

    Love, Renee

    Reply

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