copyright-Janet Webb
It is only in sorrow bad weather masters us; in joy we face the storm and defy it.-Amelia Barr
100 words/Genre: General Fiction
Thank you Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for hosting Friday Fictioneers. I am so honored to write with such a great group of writers. Please be sure to go to her page and read their stories too. We are a rather eclectic group and the genres run the gamut.
I welcome kudos and criticism. Thank you so much for reading my work.
Eleanor was unsure why thunderstorms had always enraptured her. Chaotic thrashing of wind causing the rain to spatter her form. Some of that spray would enter her mouth, enticing her like a deep French kiss.
She’d stand in the middle of that anarchy, savoring the peace it gave her turbulent mind. The driving rain drenched her fair skin and the current from lightning strikes ignited her body and soul.
Early morning light revealed the aftermath. Calamity gave way to a flood and shopping carts in her backyard. Clad in rain boots, she slogged across the drenched earth to retrieve them.
Now I know why it is hard to get a shopping cart at the grocery store! Kudos!
Jim 🙂
Thank you Jim. Damn those shopping carts that end up in our back yard!
Love, Renee
I want to play Neil Young’s “See the Sky About to Rain” followed up by “Like A Hurricane” while reading this. Oh wait. I can do that! (Isn’t technology wonderful?)
Great story.
Technology is fabulous my darling! Here you go. Think I like Neil Young’s song better for my story. Mwah!
Love, Renee
Hi Renee, lovely story, I enjoyed it….calamity is such a good word.
Honey, I’m a calamity so the word was perfect to use in my story. So happy you liked them both.
Love, Renee
so good when you can use the right word that ha both meaning in context and meaning to you……very clever…..have a good day.
Great little piece, especially loved the “like a deep, wet french kiss” well not literally, lol, but what a great metaphor 😉
Thank you so much. I rely on popular metaphors too much sometimes. So I thought I’d create my own. 🙂
I like the contrast of the violent storm and the calm it brings. Nice vivid descriptions
Thanks my love. Mwah!
Love, Renee
🙂
Drat! Stole my line. Well, I’ll chime in with “ditto” and leave it at that.
Have a storm-free weekend and feel better. Disinfect the keys on your laptop when you do. 🙂
janet
Dear Janet,
I like your ‘ditto’. Thank you so much honey.
I’m feeling better but will take your advice to disinfect my keyboard. I’ve been washing my hands and sanitizer like a mad woman.
Have a great weekend my dear.
Love, Renee
I liked that this was not a destructive flood, and had that “calm after the storm” feel to it. I love the smell of “just after the rain”!
No destruction this week my darling. There was calm and clean up for sure though. That smell of just after the rain is the best. Especially in springtime when the scent of fresh flowers is carried on the gentle wind.
Love, Renee
It is about storm something fierce here. I don’t mind driving in the rain if I’m not in any hurry but I hate driving in the rain during rush hour!
Always time to rethink. The bueaty of being just a people.
Yes, you’re so very right.
Love, Renee
I love the contradiction of violent storm and the calm it brings. Serenity CAN be found in the middle of chaos if one just stops to look.
Keep Inspiring
Thanks for the kind comment Love. It really is my element of calmness. A thunderstorm brings me peace. Just like it does for Eleanor.
Love, Renee
I like the kiss 🙂
Thanks love. I kinda did too.
Nice imagery. I really dig on the Friday Fictioneer stuff. Been thinking about tryin out for the team for awhile now. How does one go about?
Hey Adam,
It’s so good to hear from you my sweet. Go to Rochelle Wisoff-Field’s blog to find out more about Friday Fictioneers. It’s a lot of fun or it could have you banging your head against a wall trying to come up with a good story. It’s helped me considerably in honing my craft. OMFG does that last sentence sound trite! But it really has. If you have any questions, feel free to ask. I’ll be glad to help. Click the link under my comment to find out more. 🙂
Love, Renee
http://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/2013/10/16/18-october-2013/
a great title Chaotic Peace and i love how you compared the spray to a deep, wet French kiss. 🙂
Hello there my dear, I kinda like that sentence the best also. There’s nothing like a deep, wet French kiss. Even if it’s only from the rain.
Love, Renee
I didn’t relish the ‘deep wet French kiss’ with my breakfast, evocative though it was. 🙂 Nice one Renee.
You’re right my dear, maybe over breakfast it was kind of too much. Glad you liked the story though.
Love, Renee
Dear Renee,
I certainly felt the driving rain pelting me in the face. Arousing piece to say the least.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Dear Rochelle,
So glad you liked it. Thank you for the kind words.
Love, Renee
Renee- I love your story. I too have sought peace in the gale. Enjoyed the french kiss metaphor- no wonder I like salt water.;)
Oddly I tripped up on “current from lightening……” I had to reread to figure out it was an electrical current not a time designation, as in currently. I reworked that sentence to make sense in my head but it added a word. 😦 Do with it as you will.
Example: The driving rain drenched her fair skin and the current from lightning strikes ignited her body and soul.
Dear DCT,
I like your sentence far better than mine. Thanks so much for the edit. I will make the change and see if I can omit another word from the story. Don’t you love the discipline it takes to keep the story at 100 words? I know I do. You’re such a peach for helping make the story flow better.
Love, Renee
Renee,
I do love the 100 word discipline. So glad to help the flow. 😉
Dana
Thanks again hon.
This is quite saucy, Renee. I loved the intensity and the shopping carts ending up in the backyard. Well done!
I didn’t really mean for it to be saucy. I just wanted to convey the intensity of the feelings that Eleanor would feel when she would stand in the middle of a storm.
Thank you for the kind comment.
Love, Renee
Eleanor’s a bold character; I like her spirit to stand in the middle and enjoy the storm. That was some serious store, too, to bring shopping carts to her backyard!
Yeah Eleanor is pretty damn tough. If I’d had more words to work with, I would have included a tornado. Funny, the carts ended upright even after the storm.
Love, Renee
Dear Renee
I loved your story. There is something about a storm, the intensity, the unpredictability, the fascination – like an affair really….
Well done
Dee
Dear Dee,
I’m glad you got that sense from the story. It kind of is like an affair. It really is. I’m one of those that flirts with the danger of storms. They truly are my element, and my character’s too.
Love, Renee
Dear Renee,
Your description of the thunderstorm left me excited and waiting for what would come next. Then the lightning ignited her. I cleared out.
Good story.
Aloha,
Doug
Dear Doug,
I didn’t mean for it to be an erotic story, but it kind of was. The kiss, the lightning igniting her. I guess it was rather saucy.
Thanks for the kind comment.
Love,
Renee
Renee, this one is just wonderful! Love the setting, the pace and that final line really nails it for me. Fantastic! I too, love a good storm.
Thank you my dear for the kind words. xoxoxoxoxoxo
Aren’t storms wonderful? I think they’re the only thing that can quiet my mind.
Love, Renee
We moved to the Pacific NW 12 years ago, and storms are VERY rare here. All my life, I had them and I miss them SO much! They calm and quiet my mind, too; and, nothing helps me release my feelings, like a big storm. Thunder and lightning just release it all. 🙂
I get you my darling, I most certainly do. I don’t know if I I could ever live anywhere that didn’t have frequent storms.
Hmm, storms are sexy, but this one…wow!
Scott
Mine: http://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2013/10/16/ff-friday-fictioneers-100-words-photo-prompt-10182013-rated-pg13/
Storms are my favorite, and obviously they are Eleanor’s too. Can’t wait to read yours….
Love, Renee
Thanks!
Phwoar!
AnElephant loves this!
This sparkly girl is so pleased. xoxoxoxxoxoxox
Love, Renee