You Gotta Get Up and Try, Try, Try

My day started as usual. The alarm went off and I practically knocked the fucking thing on the floor to shut it off. I snuggled with Heidi Jo Jo, the Wonder Schnauzer. She licked my nose. I dragged my ass out of bed, said my good morning to Roger Darling and headed to the shower. As I was stumbling into the tub, Heidi had to have me pet her one more time. Of course I talked to her like she was a baby. Her little nubbin wagged excitedly with the extra loving. Afterward I dressed in warm clothes. Grabbed some coffee. Chatted with Rog. Did my hair. All the normal boring shit I usually do.

As I was walking outside to go warm up my car, I slid on the frost covered deck and fell on my ass. I let out a huge laugh that brought Roger to our picture window. As usual he shook his head at me. Then he raised his shoulders as if to say, “What the fuck woman?” I just kept laughing and picked myself up. Wiped my ass off as I headed out to my car and started it up. I do have a new Candy Blue, the Stripper Car. She’s more curvaceous  than my other Candy Blue. But curvy girls are always better. There’s more to hold onto.

I made my way to work with the stereo cranked to 11, changing stations constantly and singing my brains out. Typical drive in. I was screaming to P!nk’s new release, Try when my Sync system cut in. It was Roger Darling of course. He asked where I was. I let him know I was almost to the parking structure. He said he had just talked to mom and that one of our family members had been found dead this morning. I started crying. He told me to hold it together and call her back. I did. She sounded sick with grief. She told me no more details than my husband did. I made sure to tell her I loved her and to call me with any news.

In the span of five minutes and two phone calls my life changed. My mundane morning routine was turned upside down. My happiness, replaced with grief. For my sweet cousins.  My entire family. As usual death will bring us together. We will hug, cry and reminisce. We will remember and look forward. We will hold on. We will let go.

Much love my dear friends. Much love.